William 'the dog' Gallas (Arsenal)
Martin 'the part time ice cream man' Laursen (Aston Villa)
El Hadji Diouf (Blackburn)
Ebi ' guiness world record for longest errr.... you know what!!' Smolarek (Bolton)
Maroune '11 yellow cards in a season and space for more' Fellaini (Everton)
Dean 'the pug face' Windass (Hull)
Mark 'the most famous Aussie since crocodile dundee' Schwarzer(Fulham)
Nemanja ' the Serbian version of Pogatetz' Vidic (Man Utd)
Emanuel 'the mad dog' Pogatetz (Middlesbrough)
Jose 'Jonas isnt really my name, its a nickname but I'll have it put on the back of my shirt anyway' Gutieresz (Scummy Newcastle United)
Peter 'the robot' Crouch (Pompey)
Djribil 'grass on his head? no, just another wacky hair'do' Cisse (Sunderland)
Neurelho 'looks like and plays like Gollum from Lord of the Rings' Gomes (Spurs)
Roman 'I have a tattoo of a packet of Jelly beans above my left nipple' Bednar (West Brom)